Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Randomize
