don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
