im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize