KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
ok first of all what the fuck
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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