everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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