is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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