No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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