..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Randomize
