on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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