found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
