When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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