I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize