Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
