It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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