just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
