If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize