OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
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