i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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