Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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