should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Just took my morning after pill in the library
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
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