So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Hippo gnu deer
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Randomize
