But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
