So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Randomize
