FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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