What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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