Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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