escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Bang-toberfest begins!!
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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