Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
