I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
