I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
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