New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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