When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
