why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
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