dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
