You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
