she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
