did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
did you just send me my own nude
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
