Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
