who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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