We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
