Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
