i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
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