We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
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