This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
