i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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