youre lurking in front of me
Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
You've changed since you got that strap on
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize