11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
