the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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