Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
