Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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