i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize