Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize